Top Beer Benefits
Have you ever wondered how beer can daily improve your routine life ? well for starters..
-it makes her look pretty and interesting while it makes him look less stupid and more funny
-its also good for the skin and it tastes even better when you lick that foam right off the lips of each other
damn this is so unfair, imagine all the lip foam being wasted here without a proper designated licker !
-it clears your thoughts and makes you focus on the important stuff in life, mainly sleeping and sex/screwing, and dont worry she wont mind you sucking so much anymore at it as long as she’s on a steady beer buzz also
-it declares you a man, only a true grownup can drink beer while watching football while eating cheese natchos and scratching his ass somehow too in the process with his buddies
-its the best thing god created after girls and barbecues and goes great with them
god’s holy trinity all together in this one picture
-it develops your resistance by dulling it, you will not feel so bad after someone hits you again with a chair on your forehead for ass grabing his girlfriend
-a nice cold beer sixpack will replace that useless body sixpack of yours in no time, those new love handles will make you irresistibly hot and sexy thats a promise
-its the perfect excuse to go to germany and expand your horizons in german beer fests and mingle with the natives
beer natives that the Christopher Columbus explorer in you will be courageously mingling with
-half a dozen beers will make you want to kiss your girl’s lips lustfully, another half a dozen more beers later will make you want to kiss her purse passionately and call her fashion purse sweet names while love making
-if you’re a lady beer is always good to get him buzzed and smiling so you can have your way with your sister’s hot boyfriend in clear conscience without him even remembering anything
-it makes you come up with the most creative ways to drink it, like with a hose and/or gallon and from between the tits of your very own best girlfriend !
that’s very commendable, but truth be told beer has been sucked many times before like this..
wait a minute… holy sweet jesus have mercy, no comment
now this beer proof of concept on the other hand is more creative not to mention more challenging..
-it always beats sniffing glue and wall paint if you are stuck in some prude gulf desert emirate, assuming you can get hold of one without getting your head chopped off first
-you’ll grow happier the more you drink and the more brain neurons you end up killing, everyone knows happiness gets stolen away by intelligence
So yeah as you can see dear reader beer has many benefits true, but most importantly it makes for the truest hearted catalyst for any ZQuill article anytime :p
another magical moment only made possible thanks to the power of beer magic !